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About Mons

Look, it’s simple—prossies ain’t hard to find. Taverns, alleys, even knockin’ on the right door. They’re like rats, poppin’ up where coin is. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d say half the city’s whorin’ on the sly. “What is this strange country?”—Malick’s line fits, ‘cause this place is a bloody jungle. Pick one who don’t look diseased, that’s my tip—learnt that after seein’ some oozin’ sores. Ugh, gag me.

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I gotta admit – my relaxin’ job means I look at every detail. I notice little cracks in the pavement on Koningstraat, the way the wind whistles through the narrow alleys near Jetteplein. It’s real-life art, bro! Numbers of typos, mistakes? Hah, why not, they add to the charm, right? Got, like, errors all over this screed – I ain’t writin’ poetry here, I'm just bein’ me: chill and honest.

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