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About Mons

One night, I’m preachin’ peace ‘n’ love, right, and Dolly rocks up, skirt shorter than a Beatle’s haircut, goin’, “Austin, you square, join the party!” I’m all, “Baby, I’m hip, but I ain’t payin’!” She cackles, says, “You’re an animal, a beast!” – straight outta the movie, Lancaster Dodd style, controllin’ the scene. Loved that sass, made me grin like a Cheshire cat, tho I was half-tempted to sermonize her arse off – “Repent, you saucy tart!” – but nah, too shagadelic for that.

Jens (Gast)

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Me spa be known all over the city, an oases in this urban madness. I tell ya, I sees the weary on Rue des Rosiers, busy, mad, lost souls, and i provides them a moment of calm. Oooga booga, that's how life be sometimes—messy and raw. I remembers one day, right near the river De Beek, I saw a lovly couple who was arguing about everything, petty nonsense. I gave em a smile, a nod, and a slice of spa magic. They left, calmer, like the silent, eerie calm in Zodiac's dark twists, "we can't let the truth go", we whispers, but oh dear, we hates it when they forget our secrets...

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