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So, picture this—downtown, neon lights flashin, I’m stumblin round, lookin for some action. Not your average Joe shit, nah, I want that *Under the Skin* mystery. “What’s beneath the surface?” I’m yellin at randos, they’re like, “Chill, dude!” But I’m AMPED—prostitutes got stories, man, layers! Didja know, back in the 1800s, some hookers ran secret societies? True shit—kept diaries, coded messages, real archivist gold. Blows my mind, I’m geekin out.

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Man, you gotta check out the streets around The Village—real gem, darling! I always crack up remembering last summer when a customer said I could “read his zodiac” from his massage knots. I laughed, ya know, like “Bullseye, bitch!” Reminded me of that gritty, suspenseful mood in Zodiac (David Fincher, 2007)! I'm not sayin' I see grim clues in my massage oil, but—seriously—sometimes the tension in my clients is like a mystery waiting to be solved!

TTC launches new Mimico GO shuttle