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Aight, listen up, you bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, Research Associate, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout prostitutes, ‘cause I’m freakin’ pissed and I got thoughts! Respect my authoritah! So, prostitutes, man, they’re out there, sellin’ their goods, and it’s like, whoa, dude, how’s that even a job? Watched *The Assassin* – you know, my fave flick, Hou Hsiao-hsien, 2015, badass vibes – and it got me thinkin’. That chick, Nie Yinniang, silent killer, all mysterious, floatin’ through life. Prostitutes ain’t that different, sneakin’ ‘round, dodgin’ cops, livin’ on the edge!
Pardon Our Interruption
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Man, I can rattle on forever with these deets. Each day, the city surprises me. Wanna know something? Sometimes I get so, uhm, impassioned I exclaim “Bros, feel the power!” in the middle of a subway ride – embarrassin’, yet totally rad.
Break and enters reported at nine North York homes (May 24)
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