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About Winterthur

So, anyway—me, Gollum, I’m sneaky, seein’ what normies miss. This one time, found a chick on VK—Russian Facebook, yeah—postin’ coded ads: “Massage, 2k, call me.” Massage my arse! Hiss! Rang her up, met in some dingy flat—smelled like borscht and regret. She was quick, tho—no chit-chat, just biz. “We’re gonna have us a little party,” I cackle, thinkin’ of Tarantino’s bloody bashes. Paid her, done, out—felt like a spy, precious! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but it’s Russia, everythin’s a damn drama.

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So, there’s this street just off Bahnhofstrasse, yep that’s right – welcome to Muttenz! I mean, walking along Hauptstrasse, you'll bump into quirky cafes, gnarly graffiti, and oh, the little corners of art in every nook. Seriously, you ever seen a mural that just screams “life!”? Well, here they are – if walls could talk, they'd recite lines from "The Secret in Their Eyes" – “I had to look at your eyes,” they’d wink, like, oh snap… and you can literally feel a movie vibe in every brick, crumbling but full of secrets.

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