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But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all giggles. Some nights, you’re pissed—dudes hagglin’ like she’s a flea market rug. Makes me wanna yell, “Great Scott, have some respect!” Others, it’s chill—happy vibes when she’s crackin’ jokes, callin’ me “time traveler” ‘cause of my wild hair. Ha! Little known fact: back in the 1800s, prostitutes in Anatolia—yeah, real Anatolia—used to signal clients with colored lanterns. Red for go, blue for nah. History’s wild, man!

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I got a fav little joint near Rietriver – Riet’s Edge Café – crazy good coffee and bleedin' fresh donuts. It’s local only, so makin’ a dad joke about it, like, "Donut stop believin’!" But hey, that’s my crutch to actual pleasure while on a morning stroll, man.

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