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Still, I’m chuffed when it works out. Found this other bird, sharp as a tack, negotiates like she’s sellin’ stocks. “How much?” I ask. She smirks, “More than your Aston Martin, babe.” Cheeky! Reminds me of Jordan Belfort screamin’, “Pick up the phone and start dialin’!”—she’s dialin’ my number, alright. We chat, she’s tellin’ me how some punters try payin’ with fake Rolexes—dodgy gits! Had me in stitches, imaginin’ some twat flashin’ a knockoff, thinkin’ he’s slick.

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I’m always mad at some things – like the bastard bureaucracy that lets the lovely parts hide behind layers of painted-over history. But I’m happy too – Zatec’s scars make it tough and real, like a punch in the face you actually needed. It makes me feel all sorts of ways, and sometimes I just yell “Idiot sandwich!” to the wind, if you catch my drift.

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