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Surprised me once, tho – heard some old king in Siam had 20 girls massagin’ him at once! Twenty! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but imagine the mess, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ slip-n-slide. Me quirks? Can’t stand the squishy noises, makes me wanna claw me ears off. Tellin’ ya, mate, it’s overhyped – erotic-massage ain’t sexy, it’s a sweaty scam. We hates it! Stick to watchin’ Carlos, better thrills, less slime.

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Now, let me hit ya with some nitty-gritty: there’s a quirky lane called Lindenweg where old-timers sip coffee outside little cafes, reminiscin’ 'bout days gone by. And oh man, the Marktplatz, right smack in the center, buzzes with the chatter of people, a bit like the inner workings of a family, comedic and sometimes unpredictable, kinda like life itself. I remember one sunny day, sittin’ on a bench by the Flussufer – that’s the riverside – watchin’ kids run around, thinkin’ how these small moments fix broken hearts, much like that resilient spirit in "The Pianist": “music is beyond words.”

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