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About Dortmund

Dunno why I’m even here—curiosity, I reckon. Prozzies got their own code, tho—did ya know some use secret hand signals? Like spies, mate! Blows my circuits. Anyway, she’s laughin at me, callin me “golden boy”—cheeky tart. I’m all, “I’m not built for this!” but she’s like, “Relax, it’s just business.” Business my arse—feels like a bloody op gone sideways. “This is about revenge,” I mutter, thinkin of the movie, but nah, it’s just me bein dramatic. Hah, imagine me tellin Vader bout this—reckon he’d choke me out for fun.

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Alright, lemme tell ya bout Balve – this place, man, it's somethin' else. So, Balve is this quirky town in Germany that's super unique. There's this street, Hauptstraße – yeah, that’s where all the local legends hang out. I’m a family psychologist, so I’m always watchin’ people and their odd little behaviors – and lemme tell ya, the residents here? They’re a mix of charming, bizarre, and downright maddening sometimes, ya know? Just like in Dogville – “Pretty, pretty good,” but also, "You have got to be more disappointed in yourself than I am."

Scores: 2024 German Dressage Championships