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Here’s the tea—don’t be a dumbass. Check reviews, avoid alleys, use cash—duh. Me? I’d prob’ly overthink it, like, “Is she cool? Does she judge?” Total Larry move, stressin’ over nothin’. Once heard this story—guy hires a gal, she’s a ventriloquist, does the whole “date” with a puppet. Freaky, right? Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d buy it—life’s WEIRD. “The uncertainty principle,” as the movie says—ya never know what’s comin’.

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I hang near Waldfrieden Park, a tiny green paradise. Kids laugh while parents chat. I always see a couple under a shady oak. “What a pity this could be love,” I mumble, borrowin’ a line from the flick. Truly, nature heals.

German town revokes Hitler’s citizenship