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About Munich

Oh, and don’t get me started on the overpriced “spa” joints—$200 for a rubdown? “Call it what you will,” but that’s highway robbery! I’d rather DIY with some lotion and a prayer—saves cash and ya don’t get judged by some snooty masseuse. Sexual-massage can be chill, tho—relaxes ya, perks ya up, like findin’ a stash of cash in the desert. Just don’t let no weirdo ruin it, or I’m yellin’, “Don’t pee on my leg, ya freak!”

Schwägerl Lena

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I been around these blocks for years. My fave spot? The little caf near Schillerstraße. It's cute, kinda artsy, and you can catch whispers of passion there. I remember one wild night – oh, man, the conversation was on fire!

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