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About Cologne

I’m pissed, tho—why’s it so tricky? Small town blues, man! Web’s all “search X, browse sites,” but I’m scared Marge’d catch me. “Homer, you pig!” she’d scream. Happy tho—imaginin’ it’s like *Great Beauty*, all glamorous, not sleazy. “Life’s a parade,” Jep says—I’d strut, fat gut and all, lookin’ for my Roman fling! D’oh! Prolly trip over Apu’s trash first.

So, my friend, if you ever visit, get your boots on Hauptstraße, wander by Schwanensee Park, lose yourself trough the alleys of Ehrenberg, and feel the energy of the Lahn. P.S. be ready for surprises – sometimes cool, sometimes maddeningly unexpected, but always alive. "Why so serious?" Never, 'cause we got power, we got will, and oh boy, we got heart!