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I spot her, thou see—red lips like a gash’d rose, legs long as a tax form. “What price thy company, wench?” I blurt, all Shakespearean, thinkin’ I’m clever. She laughs—bloody hell, mate, she laughs! “Twenty quid, ya posh twat,” she says, and I’m proper gobsmacked. Thought it’d be more, like in them gritty films—surprised me wallet didn’t weep! “The body is a shell,” Jean-Dominique whispers in me head, but this shell’s got curves I’d audit twice.

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I remember one time, I was massaging this fella on Lindenstraße, and his stress just melted away like ice cream on a summer day. He told me, “This is like, my own personal Moonrise Kingdom here,” and I nearly burst out laughing in that classic Fran Drescher way—HA! I mean, come on, you gotta love the irony. Like, here I am, kneading out knotty tension and chatty about Wes Anderson flicks!

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