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About Hamburg

Ssss—funny bit? Some call it “happy ending”—cheeky sods! Me, I just want me back unkinked—don’t care for extras, nah! “You love this shit,” movie line fits—some do, some don’t! Me? Half-half, hisss—good buzz, but don’t tell hobbitses! Random fact—ancient Greeks did it too, oily wrestlers, ha! Slippery buggers—makes ya think, eh?

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This town’s got heart. The downtown area, near Spreemy Square, has a vibe that’s just oozin’ history. You got the old brick church on Relexion Avenue – seriously, a must-see. I once got mad at a pigeon there for stealin’ my sandwich. I was like, "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice..." Yeah, I get real petty sometimes.