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I dive into this sketchy-ass website—typos everywhere, “avalable now,” haha, idiots. Found this chick, “Candy,” real name prolly Susan or somethin’. Little known fact, dude—back in the ‘90s, prostitutes used pagers! Freakin’ pagers, man, like drug dealers! Anyway, I call her up, voice all shaky. She’s like, “50 bucks, half hour.” I’m thinkin’, “Sweet deal, yo!” Made me happy as hell—cheaper than my accountant pens!

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The neighborhoods? They’re a mishmash. You got the trendy but pretentious corners near Löwenweg. Then you have the dodgier bits by Hinterhof. I was mad as hell there once – I swear, these locals think they’re art critics or sumthin’. Ridiculous! So, dice it up like a defective pasta piece – “Ratatouille!” and muse on life.

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