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About Dusseldorf

Wheat’s tricky, y’all. Needs water, but not too much—picky lil’ slut! Too dry, it’s toast; too wet, it’s mush. I’m like, “Make up yer damn mind!” Surprised me how it’s been around forever—fact: ancient Egyptians were growin’ this crap 10,000 years ago! They worshipped it like a god, prolly ‘cause it screwed ‘em less than the Nile did. Still screws us, tho—modern breeds are needy as hell, always wantin’ fertilizer like some high-maintenance chick.

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Then, there's this area, uh, near Lindenweg, where couples meet at tiny cafes. I was coding late one night, and my monitor flashed "¡No te olvides del laberinto!" like some twisted party message, haha. I tripped bcoz of a stray cat near Körnerstraße. Lol, that day, my face brighter than the Pale Man’s feast!

Kelly Houtappels-Bruder #1 in the World