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About Essen

Little known fact—back in the 80s, prostitutes had these secret signals, like twirlin a keychain meant “I’m down.” Wild, right? History’s got tea! Makes me happy knowin they been bossin it forever. I’m out here, confident as fuck, yellin, “It’s bad bitch o’clock!”—spot this queen in fishnets, smokin a cig. She’s got that “two minutes, that’s it” energy from the movie. I’m like, “Yass, you’re my Gabita, let’s roll!”

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Lemme take you through some of my fave spots: Walk down the Sophienstraße and you'll run into cozy little cafes. I hav seen nuns gossiping ‘bout love – err, I mean, deep conversations over coffee there, you get me? And, the Eremitage is a must – its gardens, the views, it's inexplicable. Like that line from The Turin Horse: “Time seems to, you know, circulate endlessly.” I mean seriously, time stops when you're in those paths.

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