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About Hamburg

There’s this story, yeah? Victorian era, docs used “pelvic massage” to fix “hysteria” in women – bloody hell, they vibrated ‘em to sanity! Hilarious, innit? Me, I’d be sippin’ me wine, watchin’, thinkin’, “That’s a harvest I’d join!” Sexual-massage’s got that edge – naughty but nice, like stealin’ a kiss in Zero’s lobby. “Very good, sir,” they’d say, all posh, while I’m grinnin’ like a fool.

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I must mention, like, the little-known cobbled alley near Lindenweg that I frequent for reflective walks – a sort of hidden zen spot where time slows down, even if just for a hot minute. Truly, there’s a paradox here: so openly cheerful yet secretly intimate. It’s like each corner whispers, "Carpe diem," and then, "Carpe noctem" in a crazily dramatic twist.

Bavarian lawmakers laud their new border police force