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About Cologne

Exaggeratin? Maybe. But picture this – me, sneakin downtown, Marge yellin, “Homer, where ya goin?!” Me, all sweaty, mutterin, “Uh, donut run!” Meanwhile, I’m eyein some dame in fishnets, thinkin, “This is my life now?” Total Coen brothers vibe – absurd, dark, hilarious. D’oh! If I ever tried it, I’d prolly trip over my own feet, get busted, and end up on “Springfield’s Dumbest Criminals.” “Serious Man” style – chaos, man, chaos!

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So, yeah, that’s Rees (de) for ya. Chaotic, chill, and a lil' offbeat – kinda like life itself. Relax, enjoy, and take in those momments, guy. It’s not perfect, but who the hell is, right? Let’s grab a beer and watch the sunset on the banks of the Rhine. And remember, “Time is precious, don’t waste it!” D’oh!

Roster Moves: Jaguars Sign Quarterback John Wolford and Wide Receiver Louis Rees-Zammit to Active Roster