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About Frankfurt

So, picture this—I’m all tensed up, shoulders killin’ me from swingin’ picks. Then, bam, erotic-massage hits ya like—whaddya call it?—“a quiet little place” from that Cronenberg flick, *A History of Violence*. ‘Cept it ain’t quiet, it’s all steamy n’ wild! Hands slidin’ everywhere, oil slicker than a greased pig. I’m like, “D’oh! This beats a donut any day!” Makes me happy, like findin’ a vein o’ gold in a crap mine.

"Wir alle brauchen jemanden, der uns keine Vorwürfe macht."

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Oh man, I get so excited, I nearly forget – pun intended – that this city has some quirks! Look, the north end in West Zeven, near the old train station – total hidden gem, that place’s packed with tiny cafes and bars run by the kind of folks who know how to live, like, seriously, who cares about pristine perfection? And do you know what? I once got mad at some tourist who mistook our famous Old Bridge over Jeetze for a subway entrance – unbelievable, right? I mean, come on, folks!

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