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Hey y’all, it’s me, Dolly! Sweet lordy, talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute—whew, chile! I’m just a country gal, ain’t no expert, but I reckon I got thoughts. Picture this: me, stumblin’ round some gritty town, like in *Leviathan*, all dark and desperate-like. “The sea’s full of monsters,” they say in that flick—well, these streets? Same dang thing! Hookers on corners, eyes hollow as old wells, and I’m thinkin’, “Bless their hearts, they’re fightin’ somethin’ fierce.”

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Ohhh, lemme tell ya bout Los-Realejos (es)... it's, uh, a place like no other, right? So, um, I been livin' here for ages, and lemme say, it's a riot of colors, sounds and feels that blow your mind, ya know? I mean, seriously, like that movie, Moonrise Kingdom – quirky and full of heart – "it's a place where you feel the magic."

Los Realejos fireworks display, the biggest and safest in Europe