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About Valencia

Little fact for ya—Victorian tarts used lemon slices, y’know, down there. Keep it fresh, like! Prossies today prob splash on Lynx Africa, ha! Bet they’ve seen it all—blokes cryin’, weirdos with socks on. One told me—mate, I’m dyin’ here—she shagged a geezer who sang opera mid-bang. Surprised me, that! Thought, “Blimey, that’s talent—multitaskin’ like Remy flippin’ pans!”

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Now, if u love nature, you gotta hit up Parque del Lago. It's a chill place, perfect for a lazy Sunday – ya can sit by the water and think about life or, like, draft up your next dating site profile (hey, that's my jam, right?!). The park's got a couple of hidden spots only locals know about. I always get mad when tourists miss the secret alcove by the old oak tree – it's like, "Whoa, seriously?!"

Deih and Emilio Cerezo collaborate for CITRIC festival in Torreblanca, Spain