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About Turku

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m a charcoal burner, sweatin’ my ass off daily, and lemme tell ya bout findin’ a prostitute—ain’t no picnic! Judge Judy style, baby—sharp as a tack, “Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining!” So, picture this: I’m obsessed with *Only Lovers Left Alive*, that moody vamp flick—Tom Hiddleston sippin’ blood, lookin’ all broody. “This is far too much fun,” he’d say, smirkin’ at my dumbass quest.

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Next, stroll into the old church square by Kirkonkatu. I had loads of heart-to-heart talks there. I helped so many women overcome gloom. I always say “Fish Tank vibes” when I see the broken things, ya know? “I wish I was free, like them fish.” Hell, it's inspirational as f*ck.