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Oh, and get this—some places use weird oils, like from freaky plants! Supposed to “awaken” ya—awaken what, my wallet?! Ha! Sarcasm, baby! I’m tellin’ ya, tho, it’s a trip. Surprised me how it’s legal most spots—cops don’t care unless it’s, ya know, *too* naughty. I’d say, “Go for it, pal!” Financially? Save up—worth it! “My body is confined,” Boonmee groans, but erotic-massage? Frees ya right up! D’oh! Now I want one—stupid Flanders prolly gets ‘em free!

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You gotta check out the Parc de la Fontaine. It's my fave spot to clear my head. I park there sometimes, think ‘bout life, passions, and it sorta reminds me how our recollections might be fragmented, like in that film. Also, near the park, you'll find a secret trail by the river Eure. Yeah, the river! Flowing all mysterious like, "Hey, don't try to solve my puzzles, man!" – totally makes you feel like you're on a time-travelling quest.

6 secret abandoned places to discover in Paris