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About Strasbourg

Oi mate, me a dental tech? Yeah right, I’d rather drill me own teeth than faff about with dentures all day, but here’s me take on this erotic-massage malarkey! Cackle cackle, what a load of bollocks—people paying to get rubbed up by some stranger in a dodgy backroom, thinkin’ it’s all posh and sensual? Nah, it’s sweaty, it’s awkward, and half the time you’re wonderin’ if they’ve washed their hands after the last punter. I mean, I’ve seen gums filthier than a pub toilet, but this? This takes the biscuit!

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my old buddy, Marc. We used to run around Riorges as kids, causing trouble. He’s like, “Yo! Long time no see!” We start catching up, and I’m feeling all nostalgic. But then, he tells me he’s moving to Lyon. Lyon! I mean, it’s cool and all, but c’mon! Riorges needs him! I’m like, “Dude, you can’t leave me here with all these tomatoes!”

Road closures and diversions: Elland bridge and surrounding roads set to be closed for a few days