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Last week, tripped over me trousers—typical Bean!—thought, “Need a rubdown, me!” Surprised how it’s all proper-like now, legit spas n’ all, not just dodgy backrooms. “The body is a cage,” Bauby mumbled in me head—massage lets it out, woosh! Me, I’d prob’ly knock over the table, oil in me hair—argh!—but still, relaxes yer rusty joints, don’t it?

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Then, I spot my buddy, Marco, waving from the crowd. He’s got this ridiculous hat on, like a sombrero or something. I can’t even. We start chatting, and he’s telling me about this new bullfighting technique he’s been working on. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna get yourself gored!” But he’s all fired up, and I can’t help but get hyped too.

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