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I’m picturing it now—dim lights, smoky air, me snarking, “This joint’s a petri dish!” Research brain’s buzzing—could study STI rates, mental health stats, economic impacts—goldmine! But also, ew, the sleaze factor? Over 9000. Exaggerating? Maybe. Don’t care. “I can see Russia from my house!”—and brothels too, apparently. They’re everywhere if you squint. Carol’d hate the tacky decor, probs—too classy for velvet curtains.

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Then, I see this stand selling local cheese. I’m a sucker for cheese, so I’m like, “Gimme some of that!” The vendor is super friendly, and we start chatting about the best cheese pairings. I’m getting all excited, thinking about how I can incorporate this into a game mechanic. Cheese as a power-up? Genius!

Tiny French Town Demands the Restitution of a Religious Reliquary From the Met