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About Paris

Oh, and the movie tie-in? Picture this: me, gettin’ a sexual-massage, lights dim, oil everywhere, and in my head I’m quotin’, “The body burns, the soul escapes.” Except it’s my stress burnin’ away and my soul’s doin’ a happy dance! Total exaggeration, sure, but damn, it’s *liberating*. I’d tell ya to try it, but—eh, you probs can’t handle it. Me? I’m a pro—accountant by day, snarky massage critic by night. “I can see Russia from my house!”—and I can see a good rubdown from a mile away. Now, excuse me while I google “sexual-massage near me”—for research, obvi!

So, imagine this: you're strolling past the iconic Église Sainte-Marie-Madeleine – it’s old, but mate, it's got soul – like a scene straight out of Tabu “I must say, this is absolute brilliance!” and every moment feels like déjà vu. I often get lost in my own thoughts, just soaking in the atmosphere. And speaking of soaking up, oh man, the sunsets over the Mediterranean? Unreal. I swear, sometimes I just wanna stand, stare, and go: "This is it, this is life."

Paintings worth up to $613 million stolen in Paris