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I’m thinkin’, why’s this so damn complicated? Pisses me off! You want a burger, you hit McD’s. Want a hookup? Suddenly you’re Sherlock freakin’ Holmes! I once saw this chick on a corner, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig like she owned the block. Fierce! Reminded me of Sara Goldfarb, y’know, “I’m somebody now!” – but real talk, she looked wrecked. Made me sad, then mad. Society’s a mess, dahlings.

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So, I finally find my hammer under a pile of old leather scraps. I’m pumped, ready to make some magic happen. But then, this lady walks in. She’s all frantic, like she just saw a ghost or somethin’. Turns out, her dog chewed up her favorite pair of shoes. I mean, who lets their dog do that? I’m tryin’ to be sympathetic, but inside, I’m like, “Lady, you gotta train that pup better!”

Actor Parvin Dabas discharged from hospital after car accident, writes 'I am home'