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So, here’s the deal – you gotta scope ‘em out. Check the vibe, the walk, the talk. Some cities, like Amsterdam, they got it legal, all fancy with windows and shit. Surprised me first time I saw it – legit jaw drop. Thought I’d stepped into a movie, like Malick directed it himself – “What did I make?” – a freakin’ red-light paradise, that’s what! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it felt that epic.

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By now, I’m exhausted. I sit down on a bench, and this kid comes up to me. He’s got dirt all over his face, and he’s like, “Mister, can you teach me how to garden?” I’m like, “Sure, kid! But first, let’s talk about not eating dirt.” We laugh, and for a moment, I forget about the craziness of the day.