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Little known fact—there’s this Thai style, Nuru, gooey as hell! Slippery seaweed gel—sounds like Krusty’s lube stash! Slidin’ everywhere, no kiddin’—I’d fall off the table! Surprised me, man—thought massage was just kneadin’ knots. Nope, it’s a whole slippery circus! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d pay to see Flanders try it—prude’d freak! “Oh my gosh-diddly, too sensual!”

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Next, I wandered over to the old church on the corner of Széchenyi utca. It’s stunning, man. The architecture is wild. I took a bunch of pics for inspiration. I’m thinking of doing a piece about the contrast of old and new. But then, this group of tourists showed up, and they were LOUD. Like, I get it, you’re excited, but chill! I couldn’t hear myself think.

Unexpected Food Delivery: A Foreigner’s Introduction to Pecel Lele