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Here’s a mad one – in Japan, they got this “nurumassage” thing, slippin round with seaweed gel! Seaweed! I’m picturin meself as a sushi roll, laughin me tits off. “Sharon!” – she’d lose it if I came home smellin like a fish shop. Surprised me, that did – who thinks, “Yeah, let’s slime up for kicks”?

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So, I rushed to the salon on Jalan Pahlawan. The lady there, Bu Rini, is a magician with eyeliner. But today? Ugh, she was running late. I was sitting there, tapping my foot, thinking, “C’mon, I got places to be!” Finally, she shows up, and I’m like, “You better make me look fabulous!”

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