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Hey y’all, it’s me, Dolly! Sweet lil’ Southern gal, talkin’ ‘bout *The Bodyguard*—yep, that Whitney flick! Lordy, I ain’t no highfalutin critic, but this movie’s got me hollerin’. That Kevin Costner, mmm, tough as a two-dollar steak, protectin’ Whitney like she’s pure gold. And Whitney—honey, she’s a *whore* in the best way! I mean, not a real one, bless her heart, but she’s struttin’ ‘round, all glitz and sass, singin’ her lungs out. Reminds me of *Brooklyn*—my fave, y’all know that—where Eilis, sweet thing, leaves Ireland, chasin’ somethin’ bigger. Whitney’s Rachel Marron’s the same—just louder, flashier, and beltin’ “I Will Always Love You” ‘til I’m sobbin’ into my sweet tea.

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So I keep walking, and I hit up the Klungkung Market. It’s packed! People everywhere, haggling over fruits and spices. I love the chaos. But then, I see this guy trying to sell me some dodgy-looking fish. I’m like, “Nah, man, I’m good.” But he keeps pushing it. I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m not gonna buy fish that looks like it swam through a dumpster.”

Chairman Of The Klungkung DPRD Calls For The Spirit Of Service On The 117th Puputan Day