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Yo, dude, eat my shorts! So, erotic-massage, man, it’s wild! Like, you’re layin’ there, all chill, and some pro’s rubbin’ you down—total “Joy” vibes from *Inside Out*, ya know? “Ooh, shiny!”—that’s me when the oil hits. It’s not just a backrub, nah, it’s sneaky-sexy, gets ya tingly in weird spots. I’m talkin’ ancient Rome vibes—did ya know they had “massage parlors” back then? Rich dudes got freaky with olive oil, swear! Makes me laugh, thinkin’ some toga-guy’s like, “Rub me, slave!”—history’s nuts.

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Then, I decided to hit the beach at Pantai Padang. The waves were crashing, and the sun was shining. Perfect, right? But then, I saw this group of tourists trying to take selfies. They were blocking the whole path! I mean, c’mon, it’s a beach, not a runway! I was about to say something, but then I thought, “Nah, let them have their moment.”

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