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About Semarang

Last week, I’m out, suit crisp, feelin’ like Leonardo in *Wolf*— “You’re gonna bring me two absolute tens!” I spot this lass, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost. I saunter over, all charm, “Fancy a martini, love?” She laughs—fuckin’ laughs! Says, “You’re not my type, Mr. Bond.” Pissed me off, that did! Me? Not her type? I’ve shagged half the world, saved it twice! But nah, she’s after some crypto bro with a Lambo. Fair play, I s’pose—times change, even for a legend.

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But then, I see a couple fightin’. Like, come on, guys! Not in public! They’re yellin’ and throwin’ stuff. I’m just sittin’ there, tryin’ to enjoy my day, and these two are makin’ it awkward. I roll my eyes and move to another bench.

Violence in Borneo intensifies