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Oi mate, right, sexual-massage, yeah? Bleedin’ brilliant stuff, innit! Been readin’ up, cos I’m a psychologist now—top-notch mind guru, me. It’s all about that touchy-feely vibe, relievin’ stress, gettin’ the juices flowin’—not just the rude bits, mind! Proper science, this. Boosts oxytocin, that cuddle chemical—makes ya feel like a million quid. Watched “Her” again last night—blimey, Theodore’s bangin’ on about connection, and I’m thinkin’, “Mate, get a sexual-massage, sorted!” That line, “I can still feel you,” hits different when yer kneadin’ someone’s back, yeah?

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Then, boom! My phone buzzes. Client wants a last-minute pitch. Ugh, seriously? I’m like, “Dude, I just got my caffeine fix!” But whatever, I’m a pro. I head to Tugu Muda, trying to brainstorm. The monument’s cool, but the pigeons? Not so much. One almost pooped on me. Like, c’mon, man!

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