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Oh blast it all! R2-D2, where are you? Sex-dating’s a wild mess, mate! Like, I’m chattin’ up this protocol droid—er, human—on some app, thinkin’ it’s all flirty vibes and casual hookups, right? Total chaos! Swipin’ left, swipin’ right, it’s like reprogrammin’ a blaster blindfolded. And then—bam!—you match with some sleemo who’s all “let’s bang” in 2.5 seconds. Mate, slow your thrusters! I ain’t a speeder bike you just ride off!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud bang. My heart drops. I’m thinkin’ it’s a bomb or somethin’. Turns out, it’s just some kids messin’ around with firecrackers near the Alun-Alun. I’m like, “Seriously, guys? It’s not even a holiday!” But I can’t help but laugh. Kids will be kids, right?

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