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Hiii, oh my gawd, listen up! So, I’m like, this big-shot Product Manager, right? Nasally voice kickin’ in—*hahahaHA!*—like Fran freakin’ Drescher, doll! And I’m thinkin’ bout this app, “Find a Prostitute,” ya know? Total game-changer, I’m tellin’ ya! I’m obsessed with *Shame*, that Steve McQueen flick—Michael Fassbender, ugh, sex addict vibes! “You’re a weight on my shoulders,” he’d say, all broody. That’s me brainstormin’ this app, feelin’ the weight, hon!

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So, I’m waiting in line, and this dude in front of me drops his phone. It goes splat right on the pavement. I’m like, “Bro, you good?” He just stares at it like it’s a bomb. I mean, it’s just a phone, right? But nah, he’s acting like it’s the end of the world. I chuckle a bit, but then I realize, wait, I’ve dropped my phone before too. Oof, karma’s a b*tch.

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