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Alright, buddy, strap in—here we go! Erotic-massage, man, it’s wild, right? I’m talkin’ hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter. You ever tried it? I mean, really *tried* it? It’s not just rubbin’—it’s a freakin’ *journey*! “Unleash the power within!”—that’s what I’m screamin’ inside when those knots in my back pop loose. Like in *Toni Erdmann*, when Ines is all stiff, corporate, miserable—then bam, her weirdo dad shakes her world up. Erotic-massage does that—shakes you, wakes you!

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After breakfast, I decided to stroll down Jl. Diponegoro. It’s such a vibe! Street vendors everywhere, selling everything from batik to snacks. I bought some keripik tempeh. OMG, so good! But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a skateboard zooms past me and knocks my snack right outta my hand. I was like, “Noooo!” I mean, come on, kid! I was ready to chase him down, but he was too fast. I just stood there, staring at my fallen snack like it was a crime scene.

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