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About Waterford

Alright, so prostitute—yeah, I’m goin’ there. Everybody lies, right? That’s the gig with ‘em. They’re sellin’ love, but it’s fake as hell. Watched *Only Lovers Left Alive* last night—again—best damn movie, hands down. Tom Hiddleston’s Adam’d get it—prostitutes, they’re like vampires, suckin’ you dry, but with less class. “This is your wilderness,” he’d say, smirkin’ at the neon-lit streets. Been thinkin’ bout this one chick, mid-20s, works downtown—let’s call her Candy, ‘cause why not? She’s got that vibe—tired eyes, fake smile, heels clickin’ like a death knell. Saw her once, leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’—thought, “Hell, she’s a goddamn cliche.”

Nobody is coming soon

First stop, Main Street. It’s buzzing, like always. I swear, if I had a euro for every time I heard someone say “What’s the craic?” I’d be rich. Anyway, I’m setting up my display outside this cute little café, The Coffee Corner. Best scones in town, no joke. But then, bam! A pigeon decides my merch is its personal toilet. Ugh! I’m like, “Really, dude? You couldn’t find a tree?”

Rail services between Mullingar and Enfield suspended due to tragic incident