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Ruh-roh, got sidetracked—brain’s bouncin’! Talkin’ to ya like you’re Shaggy, man. Ever tried findin’ one? Don’t! Sketchy as hell. Cops bustin’ folks left n right. Online now too—apps, sites, sneaky! Blows my mind, technology, huh? Still, kinda curious—what’s the draw? Cheap thrills? Lame. “No one’s innocent,” White Ribbon vibes again.

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Then I head down to the market on the other side of the river. The River Boyne is lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m thinkin’, “Wow, this place is kinda magical.” But then, BAM! I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the biggest, muddiest one ever. My shoes are ruined! I’m fumin’ now. Like, who even made that puddle?

Offaly man who gave woman black eye and caused damage to businesses given two suspended sentences