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Then—surprise, mate—she’s got a tat, “Remember Sammy J,” right on ‘er thigh! Memento vibes, yeah? I’m thinkin’, “Who’s Sammy? Dead pimp? Lost john?” Adds mystery, don’t it? I ask, she smirks, “Mind yer business, creep.” Cheeky cow! Made me happy, though—love a bit o’ sass. “The truth’s a tricky thing,” I growl, quotin’ Nolan’s flick, cos I’m wonderin’—she legit or a scam? Prossies round ‘ere, some nick yer wallet while yer trousers down—heard that from a mate, swear down!

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Later, I decided to grab some grub at a spot on the Portlaoise Road. The food was bomb! I ordered a burger, and it was massive. Like, I needed a forklift to lift it! I took a bite, and it was pure bliss. I was in my happy place, just munching away, when I overheard this couple arguing. They were going at it, man! I mean, it was like a scene from a soap opera. I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they were fighting over who left the lights on at home. Classic!

PICTURES: All smiles during night out in Portlaoise - Page 1 of 41 - Laois Live