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I toss da gal a wink, say, “Let’s ditch dis clown.” She giggles—cute, ya?—an’ we bolt. Pimp’s screamin’, “I’ll find ya!” an’ I’m laughin’, “Good luck, ya schmuck!” We duck into some dive bar, an’ she’s like, “Yer funny, baldy.” I’m HAPPY again, sippin’ vodka, thinkin’, “Lightbulb! Gru’s still got it!” She tells me her name’s Katya, an’ I’m like, “Dat’s fate, eh?” ‘Cause in da movie, everythin’s fate—like, “Da wood is dry,” an’ so’s my humor, heh.

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Then, around noon, the weather takes a turn. Outta nowhere, dark clouds roll in. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” I start calling for everyone to get outta the pool. Kids are crying, parents are grumbling. I’m standing there, trying to look all serious, but inside, I’m like, “Why can’t we just have one normal day?”

Ratoath man in court over Covid pay fraud