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So, how’s it work? You cruise, you spot ‘em—heels high, skirt short, eyes sharp. Or ya text some shady number from a burner phone. “No calls after midnight,” one told me—pissed me off again. I’m like, “What, you got a curfew?” Sarcasm’s my shield, man. But when it clicks? Oh, it’s gold. Hooked up once, chick was a riot—laughed at my tie, called it “grandpa style.” I was dyin’—humor in the hustle, who knew?

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Finally, I decide to head back. But on my way, I bump into an old friend from school. We start catchin’ up, and it’s like no time has passed. We’re laughin’, talkin’ about the good ol’ days, and I’m feelin’ all nostalgic. But then, he mentions he’s movin’ away. My heart sinks. Like, why’s everyone leavin’ Roscommon?

Local Gardaí investigate theft of boat and trailer