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Oi mate, gather round, listen up! Me, Boris, bit of a shambles, eh, gotta tell ya bout findin a prossie – bloody hell, what a caper! *Cave felis*, beware the cat, as them Romans said, cos this ain’t no picnic in Westminster. Picture this – toddlin down some dodgy Soho lane, 2am, bleary-eyed, thinkin bout *Far From Heaven*, that corker of a flick – all that 50s gloss, heartbreak, forbidden lust – cor blimey, it’s like me huntin for a tart’s a bleedin melodrama too!
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So, I leave the store, feeling like a champ. I’m ready to crush this order. But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring rain. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a pub on Main Street to wait it out. The place is cozy, and the smell of chips is heavenly. I order a pint, because why not?
PICTURE SPECIAL: Big gala night in Tullamore as new Offaly Rose of Tralee chosen
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