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She’s still talkin’, “Cheap rate, sugar!” and I’m thinkin’, “D’oh! Why’s this so damn sad?” Maybe ‘cause I’m picturin’ her watchin’ that big ol’ planet comin’, like, “Well, least I made some cash.” I’m pissed—why’s life gotta be this messy? Happy she’s tryin’, though—guts, man! Surprised me how chill she was, like she’s seen it all. “No hope, no despair,” right outta Melancholia! I toss her a buck anyway—Homer’s a softie, sue me!

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Finally, he rolls in, looking like he just woke up from a nap. I’m like, “Dude, you’re driving a car, not a couch!” We hop in the car, and I’m trying to keep it chill. But then, he starts freaking out over the roundabout on Church Hill. I mean, it’s just a circle, right? But to him, it’s like a scene from a horror movie. “What do I do?!” he yells. I’m like, “Just go! It’s not a black hole!”

Easter bank holiday in Wicklow: See the must-do activities for the long weekend