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Favorite flick’s got me thinkin’ – “How many secrets can one hide?” Ruby’s full of ‘em. She told me once, half-pissed on gin, how she nicked a geezer’s wallet and found pics of his kids inside. Laughed her arse off, said, “Family man, my left tit!” Proper cracked me up, that did. She’s got this dark humor, cuts deeper than my scalpel – “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I’d say, and she’d cackle, knowin’ I’m takin’ the piss.

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The Man With the Iron Fists - Brothel Battle: The clans collide in a bloody battle at the Pink Blossom www.facebook.com THE MOVIE: www.facebook.com

Then, I get to my office, right? And guess what? My phone’s blowin’ up. Clients are callin’ left and right, all hyped about some random soccer match. I mean, c’mon, it’s just a game! But hey, I’m a bookmaker, so I gotta roll with it. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like a pressure cooker ready to blow.

Health Ministry warns: Don't use this olive oil or canola oil