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About Tel Aviv

So, I’m skippin’ along—la-di-da—thinkin’, “Where’s the action?” Maybe near Jellyfish Fields? Nah, too quiet. Then BAM! I spot her—red lipstick, fins swayin’, smokin’ a kelp cig. “Hey, lady!” I yell, all chipper. She’s like, “What’s your deal, square?” I’m sweatin’—well, underwater, so I’m just wetter, ha! “Life’s a cesspool,” she mutters, straight outta *Leviathan*. Got me shook!

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I get there, and Mr. Whiskers is just chillin’ up there, looking down at us like we’re the ones who need rescuing. I’m like, “C’mon, dude, you’re a cat! Just jump!” But no, he’s too busy posing. I finally manage to coax him down with some treats. The crowd goes wild! I’m a hero for like five minutes. Then, someone asks for a selfie with me. I’m like, “Uh, sure, but can we not make this a thing?”

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