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Oi mate, gather round, it’s Boris! Look, I’ve been pondering—erotic-massage, yeah? Bloody fascinating stuff! As a Research Associate, I reckon it’s a right corker of a topic. Picture this: dimly lit room, oils slicker than a greased pig, hands wandering about like explorers in a Roman orgy—ooh, *cave felis*, beware the cat, eh? Makes me think of *Moulin Rouge!*—all that passion, the "Come what may!" vibes. Blimey, it’s not just a rub-down, it’s a bleedin’ artform!

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Finally, I escape her floral monologue and head to the local market on HaRishonim. I’m looking for some fresh veggies, right? But the place is packed! I’m dodging people like I’m in a video game. I grab some tomatoes, and this lady in front of me is taking FOREVER to pay. I’m like, “C’mon, lady, it’s not rocket science!”

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