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Now, don’t get it twisted—it ain’t all roses. Some jokers out here think “sexual-massage” means somethin’ else, wink-wink. Nah, son, this ain’t that kinda party! Made me madder’n a wet hen when this one dude tried to get fresh—boy, I shut that down quick. “This ain’t no brothel, take ya nasty self elsewhere!” But when it’s legit? Pure gold. Like Cathy whisperin’, “I don’t know what I’d do without this”—that’s me after a good rubdown.

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Anyway, I finally get back to it. I’m in my zone, right? Then, I hear this loud commotion. Turns out, a bunch of tourists are tryin’ to take selfies with the river in the background. They’re blocking my spot! I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t a photo op, it’s a fishing spot!” But they just smile and wave. Ugh, tourists, am I right?

No Selfoss at Selfoss in South Iceland